State of Affairs, Gimp edition. Also, Elena’s Fucktoy.

Well, howdy ho there, neighborino.

It’s been a while. And in that while, I’ve gone through hell and high water to get my ass cracking on more projects. So here’s what’s been up with me:

 

1) I’m a single mom, 2 kids. One is special needs. He’s a whirlwind and sometimes when I can’t pass the kids off on their dad for a while, I get overwhelmed and writing suffers. Oh, how it suffers from neglect– but I’m correcting that now. Between my biblical vampire tale, the pagan-influenced novel and other sundry writing projects, I decided to rewrite Intervention of Ana (what is now DARKER SHADE OF PALE) on FanFiction.com, and go even more insane into the canon. So, ahem, get ready for ELENA’S FUCKTOY. What, pray tell, you ask is that? Well, a very insightful reader gave me an idea and I’m gonna run like Forrest Gump with it. It’ll still be called INTERVENTION OF ANA, but it’s real name is so totally ELENA’S FUCKTOY. I don’t know if I can get tired of typing that.

Back in the day, Elena was to Christian, what Christian is to Ana these days; a sick individual who fucks with a dumb kid’s head. 

I’m smiling way big at where all the fun can go with that statement, by the way.

 

Want in on it? You can find it here: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10445559/1/Intervention-of-Ana

 

2) I live in Northern California. Our main exports are almonds, rice, dairy products. Rice means standing water which in turns means skeeters. Those bloodsuckers attacked me as though I was a 1996 bottle of Dom Perignon, and in my bite-scratching haze, I ended up giving myself cellulitis in my left leg. Two antibiotic prescriptions, two antibiotic shots in the ass (each cheek, in case you were wondering) and a shit load of steroids later, I’m on the mend. I spent the better part of a week in a fever/chills cycle– lovely little side effects of meds. Good news? I’ll spare you the TMI in regards to no diarrhea. Ha, ha! Fooled you!

 

3) I have been adopted by a Viking. I’ll refer to him only as The Viking– but rest assured, this author is well protected by Thor’s Hammer.

The Hammer

There is a story behind this.

Beer

I made this for my guys. Runes say, “Beer is in fridge, mighty men.”

I have known The Viking since childhood, and he and my boyfriend are very good friends. The three of us (plus my kids) are a clan– and it’s been a very long time since I’ve felt like I’ve belonged to anything really worthwhile. I feel very blessed to have both my awesome boyfriend and The Viking as family. They are good peeps.

 

The Viking introduced me to the History Channel’s show, The Vikings. I highly recommend watching it. Floki demands your attention as well.

Mischief to Ragnar's Mayhem.

Mischief to Ragnar’s Mayhem.

And if you don’t watch, well fine. But you might bring down wrath from The Viking of Disapproval.

 

The Viking of Disapproval demands mead from a goat's teat.

The Viking of Disapproval demands mead from a goat’s teat.

 

 

4) Bucky the Wonderdog passed away. He was my dad’s dog, but he only got excited around me. Granted, I spoiled him by making peanut butter-bacon-oatmeal treats, but dammit, the dog was awesome enough to warrant the making of said nummies. He is greatly missed.

 

The most awesome black lab I ever had the privilige to pet.

The most awesome black lab I ever had the privilege to pet.

 

 

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